A couple of days back, my mother walked up to me and said she wanted to share something very important, but I was not to repeat it to anyone else. She swore me to secrecy, and even though we were just two people in the room, she dropped her voice to a whisper—almost as if she was afraid that the walls, the curtains or perhaps even the sofa might overhear us.

By now, I was almost convinced that she was about to share that she had been a secret agent or a spy all this time, with access to some nuclear codes.

What she shared was far more surprising—but not for the reasons you might think.

A distant relative has depression, and has been seeking medical help, she said in a hushed tone. The young person’s family has been unable to understand why they would be going through this and feel lost about how to help them.

“Please don’t tell anyone, or ask them about it! Even members of their own extended family don’t know!” my mother said.

Now what surprised me was not that someone in my family had mental health struggles; but that in 2025, mental health illnesses are still spoken of in whispers, for fear of judgement, prejudice, and stigma.

And secondly, that my mother was also one of the people doing the whispering, considering that she has sought medical help for her own mental health struggles, and is currently doing much better after treatments, that involve taking medicines. I asked her the same and reminded her of the conversation we had multiple times over the years when we were trying to get her to overcome her own fears and apprehensions, and seek help—”if we have a fever or cough or cold, or any other physical ailment, we go see doctors and even take the necessary drugs to treat it. So why should mental health be any different?”

Now in a slightly firmer and louder voice, she agreed. “Yes! I told their mother, that I am on some medicines too and they have helped! There is nothing to hide or be worried about. With the right kind of help, they will also get better,” she said.

This is not the story of just my mother or my family, (which I am retelling after due permissions from my mother); it is the reality of many in this country. About 15 per cent of the adult population in India experience mental health issues requiring intervention, according to official estimates. However, somewhere between ‘log kya kahenge?,’ ‘will this negatively impact my future prospects in my personal and professional life,’ and ‘but does this even need medical help; can’t I just get over it?’  many are suffering in silence.

“70% to 92% of people with mental disorders do not receive proper treatment due to lack of awareness, stigma, and shortage of professionals,” according to data.

Stigma is one of the main reasons that even today people are reluctant to seek help for their mental health issues, delaying treatments or sometimes even outright refusing to get any at all. And one of the big ways that we can tackle this, is by openly talking about mental health.

Depression, anxiety disorders, bipolar disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder, schizophrenia, eating disorders, and other mental health issues are not unparliamentary words that cannot be part of civilized conversations. We do not need to drop our voices when talking about them. Would we do so when discussing somebody’s, or your own, struggles with diabetes, or cardiac diseases?

Yes, it is true that our society still has a long way to go in accepting mental health disorders as genuine health concerns and dealing with them with the required sensitivity and empathy. But as World Mental Health Day comes up on October 10, let’s take the first step in the right direction and start talking about mental health—not in whispers shrouded in shame, but genuine open conversations.

Because mental health matters too.

And yes! I am happy to hear from you!